Tuesday, January 12, 2016

Vipassana : My encounter with the truth has just begun

I am  inclined to post this as i complete around 100 + hours of Vipassana & Anapana meditation . I have also completed 10 days of retreat that helped me get deeper insight of the practice.

What is Vipassana

https://www.dhamma.org/en-US/about/vipassana


Ques: Why i started doing Vipassana ?

Ans: My desire to find truth that lied beyond the world affairs lead me to Vipassana. I was keep to eradicate suffering that i was experiencing in and around me.

Ques:What else i  do apart from Vipassana

Ans: I practice Yoga ( Pranayam + Hatha Yoga) daily for 1 hour for physical aspect of cleaning my body. It has helped to set the platform for further adventures.

Ques: What kind of state i was in before practicing Vipassana

Ans:  I faced moderate anger issues , constant conflict with self and society , ego issues , constantly occupied with thoughts etc. I didn't face any significant issues and can consider my issues as common to anyone.

Ques: How is my practice going?

Ans: I practice Vipassana daily for 1 hour in the evening . apart from this i also observe my sensations anytime i am free like driving , before sleep , walking etc.

Ques: How has it helped?

Ans:  There are many aspects of changes i am observing,

1. Mind is no more constantly generating thoughts ( self thoughts about "I")
2. Instances of anger and loosing control has come down
3. Duration of anger  has come down
4. Stress has reduced alot
5. There is slight decrease in "I" and Ego issues
6. Sleep is better.
7. Self control is strengthening every passing day
8. I quit smoking , drinking , unnecessary eating and i find no quitting issues

Ques: What is the progress in Vipassana after 100 + plus days into it?

Ans:

Anapana:
Anapana  has helped in concentration.  I dont get lost with thoughts anymore during my sittings. The mind sharpness needs further development  as sometime i find my own breath disturbing my focus

Vipassana:

I don't see any aversion and craving for any type of sensations as such, however occasional -disappointments for not finding sensation does arise.

I am able to feel sensations across my body during my 1 hour sitting and also anytime i create aversion or craving, leading me to stop generating "Shakharas" to some extent.

The free flow is moderate.  I don't know what i am feeling can be termed as  ""free flow''. It needs to be further developed as the focus as any one part doesn't stay for long time.

The gross sensations are in process of getting subtle but seems like it demands much deeper samadhi that i need to develop further. Most of the time sensations are gross apart from feeling fine electric current when even i run my mind through out the body.



Ques: Do i get bored ?

Ans: Yes many time i do get bored simply sitting and watching sensation . I try to keep myself motivated by seeing videos and reading Vipassana books. It seems like a long way and i feel i am just 5 % there.


Ques: What I have learnt?

Ans: I guess i have found glimpse of truth , but i may be wrong or not ready enough

1. I feel the separation between self and body as manytime i find breathing independent of me
2. I still feel mind and self as same, as i haven't observed any such separation yet
3. Body we feel is because of sensations we produce , many times during meditation i feel the feeling of body is shaped by sensation. so eventually when i stop producing these sensation , i will move stop feeling my body. This can be wrong assumptions but it just a intuition.

I have written down what i have learnt in all these days. The experiences may differ person to person. Not reacting to sensations is important because the end result of  Vipassana is to make you a better person. The knowledge of truth is just part of the process.

I hope above information helps anyone who is interested to set himself/herself free from suffering.

Metta to everyone.

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